[jd]

Here is your opportunity for you! The fans! To write your own FRW results:

[MAV]

jd wrote:

Here is your opportunity for you! The fans! To write your own FRW results: We are renaming Dan Thunder to "Lethargic" Lanny Poffo. It's much easier to remember which leg to work on when they are color coded...."Beat on silver"! [img] "These are VERY big" says Vanity Vixen "Those are very big"-Everybody in this picture says in unison. Mike Rotundo would tell him to grab the ropes. Why out of 3 photos am I the only one in trouble?!? "Holy Christ,", says Tony Spencer, "That shirt has a whole lot goin' on"! Polar opposites collide

When fighting a vampire, I would recomend dressing more like Van Helsing

[Unibrow]

Quote:

When fighting a vampire, I would recomend dressing more like Van Helsing

Thanks for the advice. I suppose I was better prepared to fight off a tumble weed or The Marlboro Man.

[DavidDeacon]

The entire event was almost cancelled because a white-eyed zombie attack.

Until the attack was fended off by boobs and laser vision!

Fun was had by all.

[Tauron Nox]

BRAINS!!!!!





This is NOT what we meant by chain wrestling!






Scott Reed: Say uncle, or I'll start with the titty twisters!
Tarzan: Save those for the next picture.





Vanity: Wow, these really ARE fun!
Sonny & DJ: Uhhhhhh huhhhhhh.........




Lynch 2.uh oh: OH. MY. GOD.
Panther Martin: mommy. mommy. mommy. mommy.
Sarah Blackheart: You guys are such pigs. Besides, I got to stuff my face in 'em in Rochester. Jealous?



(in my best mitch Ryder voice) He pulled my tights!






I call this look COLD STEEL!




Mav, get your finger out of my ass. NOW!




You knocked my ass out! Now I'm going to put you in an...arm...bar....

REVENGE IS MINE!





See this shirt? That's right, I'm a playa.




(to the fat guy in the wheel chair) Did you fart? Good god, what did you eat? AND LOOK WHAT YOU DID TO THE WALLS!





Johnny Punch: Did you just hit on my grandma?
Johnny Vegas: You're damn right I did.




She thinks my tractors sexy




When there is no more room in hell, the dead shall walk the Earth.

[Kudo Driver]

jd wrote:

Here is your opportunity for you! The fans! To write your own FRW results:

Oh, lordy. Okay, here we go, then. FRW was live at the always lovely Zotto Gymnasium in scenic Claremont. I have seen scary fans in my day, but this show brought out some of the scariest, in particular the bearded gentleman who tried to film the entire show on his cellphone and refused to stop yelling whatever entered his little brain at a given moment, and the morbidly obese gentleman who selectively used a rather large wheelchair and who seemed to think because he was as big as Adrian Adonis, he was as tough as Adrian Adonis. This was not so. In fact, this crowd convinced me that Mav needs substantial security whenever he chooses to run Claremont. I feared for Johnny Vegas' safety at one point. Anyway, the matches...



Danny Thunder and "Shredding" Steven Marriott had an axe to grind with "Tough Talk" Tony Spencer, so he found himself a partner in "I'm Too Pretty to Work" Jonny Idol. Danny took his expected whupping from both Spencer and Idol, but Marriott saved the day by catching Spencer in a small package for the win. Nice work on the national anthem to open the show from Marriott as well.





Matty "Uneven Highwaters" Spectro somehow managed to defend his Granite State title in a brutal and hard-fought contest against Scott Reed. No George Romero, and no "Tarzan" chants, as this was apparently beyond the mental capacity of the Claremontians. A shame. Matty should fire his tailor, as his pants are seriously atrocious.






The utterly ridiculous match of the evening saw Chunky But Funky and Vanity Vixen take on the very odd team of Panther Martin (with his life coach, a well-shod Tony Spencer), Lynch 2.0 (with flashy pants and fedora) and Sara Blackmore. In a failed attempt to protect Vanity's virtue, Sonny put faux Adrian in their corner. Following many kicks to just about everyone's uterus (even those not anatomically gifted with one), Vanity scored the pin on Sara with a powerbomb.





Match of the night was the returning "Duke of Elephants" Don Chesterfield and All-Star champion Shane Sharpe in a non-title match. The Duke laid a serious pounding on Sharpe, most of it using actual scientific wrestling (gasp!). Shane tried on a few occasions to battle back, but the Duke was too much for him to handle on this night. Shane got hammered with a tiger clutch into a gorgeous overhead Rideen bomb for the pin. Here's hoping there's a return match for the title very soon, as this was a fantastic one.







The Pleasures of Pain did the Freebirds thing, as Fleshie-poo has an owie, and defended the FRW tag belts using the combination of Mav and Sledge against the unlikely tandem of Tony Star and Alex Arion. Alex had his wrestling boots on this evening (as opposed to his punch-kick boots) and delivered a solid performance. Star took the brunt of Sledge's creepy hissing face-painted anger, but the match got out of control after a few minutes and ended in a double countout as both teams brawled their way back to the locker room. Should Star and Arion become a regular pairing, I would not be disappointed.






Following intermission, "Tough Talk with Tony Spencer". Tony was wisely accompanied by Panther Martin, as I think faux Adrian may have run him over otherwise. Tony's guest was Christian Angers, rockin' the iridescent flocked velvet shirt. The scary fans did their best unintelligible and homophobic screaming in an attempt to drown out the microphone. Christian's main points were that women belong chained to the stove, he was going to lay a hurting on Setheron, and the title would come after that was taken care of.




Claremont is about 20 miles from Lebanon, home of Johnny Punch, so no surprise there were more than a few of his fans in attendance. However, some of us were steadfast in our support of the Fabulous One, Johnny Vegas. The Battle of the Johnnys was punctuated by a couple of fans screaming that Johnny Vegas has a weapon in the front of his trunks. Indeed. Johnny Punch has a very WWE-style offense, which isn't surprising. A fun little match nearly ended when Vegas clocked Punch with a domestic object (Johnny buys American) for the three count, but the ref restarted the match and Punch took the win after a reverse neckbreaker.





The evening concluded with a No-DQ brawl between Christian Angers, wearing his best taped boots, and Setheron, who doesn't vary his wardrobe for any stinking no-DQ match. Angers pulled a spike early but somehow it was never used. He then threw a tantrum until Vanity Vixen was removed from ringside. Angers tried to use his submission skills here, in addition to his belt and a chair, but Setheron wouldn't give and ended up using both belt and chair to his advantage. Action on the floor resulted in Vanity reappearing and Angers threatening to whip her with the belt. Vanity then defended herself with a high-heeled kick where it hurts. Stunned, Angers caught a faceful of green mist from the vampire and was pinned.

The in-ring action was highly enjoyable, if the other stuff was a little disturbing. A two-hour ride back to not-so-scary Roch Angeles for me... FRW returns to Leominster, MA at the Elks Lodge on Friday, 9/12.